It can be daunting to parents to know just how to raise their children. What is the right method? What steps should they take? What parenting style is the best? How can we figure out our parenting style?
All these questions can bring fear and anxiety to anyone looking to starting a family or those already in the thick of parenting. However, the lord is there to reassure us that we can develop the skills necessary to raise our children with faith and righteousness.
First and foremost, what are the parenting styles people keep talking about? Young couples just starting out wouldn't know their parenting style since they haven't had children yet. So, it's helpful to study these styles before having children.
The four main parenting styles are authoritarian, authoritative, permissive, and neglectful.
Authoritarian
Parents have high expectations and strict rules
Parents may respond with criticism, anger, or punishment if a child disappoints them
This style is sometimes called "tough love"
Authoritative
Parents can punish children when needed, but also provide feedback to help correct behavior
This style is often called the "best" parenting style because it's flexible and sets children up for good communication
Permissive
Parents are more indulgent and lenient with discipline
Parents emphasize nurturing and allowing children to have a high degree of freedom and autonomy
Parents want their kids to enjoy their childhood
Neglectful
Parents provide basic needs for the child, such as shelter, clothing, and food
Parents do not set expectations for social or academic behaviors
Parents do not support or validate a child's emotions, relationships, and self-esteem
I know for me studying these parenting styles left me discouraged and confused on how which one is the "best" style for they all seem pretty negative and depressing. However, it's good to know what to avoid and find better ways to connect with your children. That is where the lord comes in for with his guidance there can be peace and harmony in the home between parents and children.
"Righteous parenting emphasizes charity, gentleness, kindness, long-suffering, persuasion, and appropriate discipline in a warm and nurturing relationship (D&C 121:39–46). It invites children to adopt the parent’s perspective on many issues. By contrast, unrighteous dominion centers on coercion, dominion, and compulsion “upon the souls of the children of men” (D&C 121:36–37).
, “I will here say to parents, that kind words and loving actions toward children will subdue their uneducated nature a great deal better than the rod, or, in other words, than physical punishment.” President Gordon B. Hinckley (1994, p. 53)
Staying patient and solving problems without fighting and contention creates a safe atmosphere for children to come to their parents with their concerns knowing they won't be judged or criticized. It also brings the couple together as well for they are working as a team with the same goal in mind and are appreciative of each other's efforts. For its all a learning experience for the parents and the children. As time go by you figure out what works and what doesn't.
The lord will guide his children in the right way. So, relying on his guidance parents can find peace and comfort in building their family which can be very daunting and scary. So don't be discouraged you will do what is best for your family and the lord will support your efforts.
For those who would like to see what their future parenting style can take the test at this website
Resources: Google.com
Eds., A.J.H.D.C.D.T.W. D. ([Insert Year of Publication]). Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives.
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