Social Policies to Assist and Bless Families and Children

" Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs. . . . We call upon responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere

to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society. "

In order for the family unit to grow and prosper in todays society we need the support of the government. For there are specific needs some families can't provide for their children such as food, shelter, education. So do we just ignore these individuals? or do we find a way to help them whether its food stamps, subsisted housing or new social policies that meet needy families needs. We as a society can implement ways to help and support those who are struggling just to survive.

"the family is by far the most effective way to provide social, emotional, spiritual, and economic security. Some argue that when families are supported by pro-family government polices, families become stronger and problems are prevented (Bogenschneider, 2002). 

Some developed countries, such as France, provide direct benefits to families in order to support childrearing. Conversely, others argue that the government should not get involved in family matters. They see the government’s intervention as unwise because they fear government will eventually strip the family of its power and influence (Baker, 2006; Mann, 1998).`'

"Nevertheless, the well-being of families is important to society as a whole. Regardless of one’s philosophy of government and family relationships, it is difficult to find ways in which the United States government has directly promoted and supported families (Briar-Lawson, et al., 2001). 

Jacobs, Little, and Alemeida (1993) note that it was not until 1981 that the word family first appeared in the title of a subcommittee of the U.S. Congress. Since then, public discourse on the family has increased significantly. In recent years, there has been an increase in the number of government programs and policy proposals that affect family life (Cheal, 2008). Family researchers and policymakers are now collaborating to identify factors that influence family formation, living arrangements, marriage, and family relations (Moynihan, Smeeding, & Rainwater, 2004.

"In order to better help parents meet the needs of their families, government should work in partnership with employers and nonprofit organizations. Government can provide Social Security, health care, and related services, while corporations and employers can offer pen-ions, health insurance, and other benefits. 

Churches and non-profit organizations also can contribute to family welfare by giving spiritual guidance, counseling, food, shelter, clothing, and other necessities. In order to provide the comprehensive social service needs of families, these three groups must become partners. They each have a role to play in helping families.

I truly believe it takes a village to build a strong family unit. Yes its easier to just focus on your own family but what will happen if something happened and you needed help and no one was willing to give you a hand? how would that make you feel? It goes back to treating others the way you want to be treated and if you have the opportunity to help those less fortunate then you should do it. 

Its not just the governments responsivity to support families and individuals. Its everyone's responsibility as brothers and sisters in Christ. The ideal would be government policies working hand in hand with charitable causes to create programs to that can reach even further in supporting vulnerable families.

resources

Eds., A.J.H.D.C.D.T.W. D. ([Insert Year of Publication]). Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives. BYU Bookstore Publishing Services. https://byui.vitalsource.com/books/9780842528030

Should I stay or Should I go? considering divorce versus sticking it out

 Marriage between man and woman is essential to [God’s] eternal plan

But what do we do if that marriage isn't working or progressing as we want to? Do we stick it out for the kids? is it ok to consider divorce? is there any hope of salvaging it to where it once was?

These are all necessary questions to consider if you find yourself in a struggling or troubled marriage. The ultimate goal is a healthy, loving marriage where you don't have think about divorce. However, in some cases it doesn't always work out that way. So, if we do get divorced does that mean we failed or that we are bad people? Will the lord be disappointed or judge us? Of course, not the lord loves his children no matter if we are single or married. And no, we aren't bad people it's just that situation didn't work out.

So, what about members of the church? Do they need to worry about divorce?

"Faithful Latter-day Saints are hardly immune to divorce. Precise estimates of the Latter-day Saint divorce rate are difficult to obtain. One estimate is that

25 to 30 percent of Latter-day Saint couples who regularly attend Church experience a divorce (Heaton, Bahr, & Jacobson, 2004). Other researchers estimate that the lifetime divorce rate for returned missionary men was about 12 percent and for women about 16 percent (McClendon & Chadwick, 2005). While it is heartening to know that the divorce rate for faithful Latter-day Saints is much lower than the national average, still many Latter-day Saints face difficult decisions regard many other countries, as well (Popenoe, 2008). Faithful Latter-day Saints are hardly immune to

divorce. Precise estimates of the Latter-day Saint divorce rate are difficult to obtain. One estimate is that

25 to 30 percent of Latter-day Saint couples who regularly attend Church experience a divorce (Heaton, Bahr, & Jacobson, 2004). Other researchers estimate that the lifetime divorce rate for returned missionary men was about 12 percent and for women about 16 percent (McClendon & Chadwick, 2005). While it is heartening to know that the divorce rate for faithful Latter-day Saints is much lower than the national average, still many Latter-day Saints face difficult decisions regarding serious problems in their marriages at one time or another. Some will find themselves at a crossroads, pondering whether their marriages can be repaired or would best be ended "

So yes, even members of the church aren't immune from divorce. There is no perfect relationship, but we do our best to make it healthy and successful despite our own shortcomings. I'm not saying to stay in an unhealthy marriage just to avoid divorce but maybe try working it out before going to divorce. There is counseling, therapy, trial separation, all sorts of things you can try if both partners are willing to put in the effort.

" First, President Gordon B. Hinckley (2000, p. 134) said: “There is now and again a legitimate cause for divorce. I am not one to say that it is never justified. But I say without hesitation that this plague among us

. . . is not of God.” Referring directly to the doctrine of marriage, Elder Dallin H. Oaks (2007, p. 70) explained:

“Because ‘of the hardness of [our] hearts’ (Matthew 19:8–9), the Lord does not currently enforce the consequences of the celestial standard [of marriage]. He permits divorced persons to marry again.” Like the ancient Israelites whom Moses suffered to divorce (see Deuteronomy 24:1), Latter-day Saints too struggle to live the higher law. Thus, a loving God gives us a law more aligned with mortal capabilities and circumstances. In addition, Elder Oaks (2007, p. 71) taught that “when

a marriage is dead and beyond hope of resuscitation, it is needful to have a means to end it.” For Latter-day Saint couples, it would be wise to make this determination in consultation with a bishop. Elder Oaks also explained that when one spouse abandons the other, the option of divorce allows an innocent spouse to remarry"

The lord knows our needs and situations and would never punish us or make us feel bad for getting a divorce. I personally feel he would rather us get out of unhealthy situation then staying and suffering. The purpose of this life is to grow and progress as individuals and as painful divorce can be it also provides lessons and experiences that help us become better, stronger individuals. Also, the decision to stay or divorce is between the couple, and the lord. So, we should never force our opinions onto them thinking we know what's best for them.

Resources

• 
  

Eds., A.J.H.D.C.D.T.W. D. ([Insert Year of Publication]). Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives. BYU Bookstore Publishing Services. https://byui.vitalsource.com/books/9780842528030

Building strong families through work and faith

 For young couples just starting out the thought of parenting and family can both a joy and a worry. Many young couples dream of what their future family life will be like and create great expectations for how it will be. However, it can also create anxiety and uncertainty as well when it comes to family roles. Who will work? who will stay home? how will we discipline and reward them? who will do the house chores? who will handle the money? What rules and values do we want to setup for our home?

All of this question can create great anxiety and nervousness for young people who don't know the answer to those questions. Yes, it would be nice to have that comfort and security going in having the answers to the questions however parenting is something where you learn as you go, and you won't find out what works and what doesn't until you are experiencing it firsthand.

However, the lord does provide comfort and guidance we can follow to increase harmony in the home where every member is working towards the same goal. For harmony in family life is a labor of love with each member contributing to the desired outcome.

" Family work provides endless opportunities to recognize and fill others’ needs. It thus teaches us to love and serve one another, inviting us to be like Jesus Christ. Elder Neal A. Maxwell observed,

“The divine attributes of love, mercy, patience, submissiveness, meekness, purity . . . cannot be developed in the abstract. These require the clinical experiences. . . . Nor can these attributes be developed in a hurry"

The focus shouldn't be on the task but, on the person, and what we can learn about each other while fulfilling family tasks. For example, recognizing Susie's skill in organization through cleaning kitchen, or Bobbies skills in scheduling by keeping the family, Calander.

"When family members work together in the right spirit, a foundation of caring and commitment grows out of their shared experience. The most ordinary tasks, like fixing meals or doing laundry, hold great potential for connecting us to those we serve and with whom we serve."

"Family work thus reveals a profound potential to strengthen and heal relationships. Performing mundane yet essential tasks for those who cannot do so for them-selves can create, in the absence of pride, a precious connection between giver and receiver. As we figuratively touch each other at the simple level of everyday need, routine acts of service begin to mend f feelings and foster unity. A mother of four related:

"When my mother was twelve, her mother abandoned her and left her with an alcoholic, abusive father. My mother knew why my grandmother left but still felt cheated.  Their relationship had been strained for years when my grandmother was diagnosed with terminal cancer. But my mother decided to care for her.  At first, she resented her mother’s constant demands.

 She had to say a silent prayer at the door of Granny’s bedroom every time she entered. But something happened during the five months that my mother gave round-the-clock service to my grandmother. My mother came to deeply love her mother. She later explained to me, “When I took care of her, I could see who she was. When I would bathe her or see her in a vulnerable moment, my whole body would fill with love and warmth, and I would just feel for her. I got back more than I gave.”

This is a perfect example of how through service the lord can soften our hearts enough where we can feel that Christ like love and restore fragmented relationships through humility and forgiveness. There is no perfect family or perfect situation, but the lord doesn't expect perfection. He just wants to do our best and never give up and he will bless us with healing in his wings.

So, for the young couples just starting out don't fret you will figure out what's best for your family. Knowlege comes in time and experience, but you will get there and build a strong happy family life if you build your foundation on the Lord Jesus Christ.

Sources

• 
  

Eds., A.J.H.D.C.D.T.W. D. ([Insert Year of Publication]). Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives. BYU Bookstore Publishing Services. https://byui.vitalsource.com/books/9780842528030

sanctification and Cooperation: How Prayer Helps Strengthen Relationships

 Successful marriages . . . are established and maintained on principles of. . . prayer.

Developing a routine of prayer both individually and as a couple bring can bring the spirit of peace and harmony into the home. It also drives away contention and misunderstandings allowing clear concise communication while strengthening love and empathy between couples.

"Drawing on the powers of heaven through prayer is a powerful resource available to couples that can make a good relationship better and can heal a faltering marriage. Prayer is included as a key principle for building a successful marriage and family"

So how can couples bring the power of prayer into their daily life?

1. Pray together as a couple in the morning and at night.

2. Take turns saying the prayer

3. Pray for each other in your individual prayers

4. Pray together before making big decisions

5. Develop couple scripture study and family home evening.

6. Receive priesthood blessings

7. Study principles of prayer in the scriptures and general conference talks together as a couple.

8. Attend the temple together as couple

So how do these practices affect our marriage? It creates a holy, sanctified marriage relationship.

"Mahoney and colleagues (1999) introduced the idea of “sanctification of marriage” as perceiving one’s marriage as being holy and sacred. They defined sanctification of marriage as a process by which secular aspects of one’s relationship are perceived as having spiritual significance "

". A “sanctified” relationship ought to be a happy relationship as people go to great lengths to protect and preserve that which they perceive to be sacred"

"Prayer is the means by which individuals may invite God to play an active role in their relationship. Including God in a relationship as one of the “threefold cords” through praying for one’s partner should imbue the relationship with perceived sacredness. As individuals pray specifically for the well-being of their partner, they come to perceive their relationship with this person as being holy and sacred"

So, by allowing God into our lives and marriages he can bring his love and power into our lives. He is our loving Heavenly Father, and he wants us to successful in life and especially in our family life. He has given us the family proclamation that states roles and principles for successful marriages. He also has given us repentance, prayer, modern revelation, temple principles to which if we apply in our lives we will be strengthened and edified. We will also have his presence in our lives watching and guiding us to the best things if we live our lives faithfully.

resources

Eds., Alan J. Hawkins, David C. Dolahite, Thomas W. D. Successful Marriages and Families: Proclamation Principles and Research Perspectives. Available from: Brigham Young University - Idaho, BYU Bookstore Publishing Services, [Insert Year of Publication].