Marriage between man and woman is essential to [God’s] eternal plan
But what do we do if that marriage isn't working or progressing as we want to? Do we stick it out for the kids? is it ok to consider divorce? is there any hope of salvaging it to where it once was?
These are all necessary questions to consider if you find yourself in a struggling or troubled marriage. The ultimate goal is a healthy, loving marriage where you don't have think about divorce. However, in some cases it doesn't always work out that way. So, if we do get divorced does that mean we failed or that we are bad people? Will the lord be disappointed or judge us? Of course, not the lord loves his children no matter if we are single or married. And no, we aren't bad people it's just that situation didn't work out.
So, what about members of the church? Do they need to worry about divorce?
"Faithful Latter-day Saints are hardly immune to divorce. Precise estimates of the Latter-day Saint divorce rate are difficult to obtain. One estimate is that
25 to 30 percent of Latter-day Saint couples who regularly attend Church experience a divorce (Heaton, Bahr, & Jacobson, 2004). Other researchers estimate that the lifetime divorce rate for returned missionary men was about 12 percent and for women about 16 percent (McClendon & Chadwick, 2005). While it is heartening to know that the divorce rate for faithful Latter-day Saints is much lower than the national average, still many Latter-day Saints face difficult decisions regard many other countries, as well (Popenoe, 2008). Faithful Latter-day Saints are hardly immune to
divorce. Precise estimates of the Latter-day Saint divorce rate are difficult to obtain. One estimate is that
25 to 30 percent of Latter-day Saint couples who regularly attend Church experience a divorce (Heaton, Bahr, & Jacobson, 2004). Other researchers estimate that the lifetime divorce rate for returned missionary men was about 12 percent and for women about 16 percent (McClendon & Chadwick, 2005). While it is heartening to know that the divorce rate for faithful Latter-day Saints is much lower than the national average, still many Latter-day Saints face difficult decisions regarding serious problems in their marriages at one time or another. Some will find themselves at a crossroads, pondering whether their marriages can be repaired or would best be ended "
So yes, even members of the church aren't immune from divorce. There is no perfect relationship, but we do our best to make it healthy and successful despite our own shortcomings. I'm not saying to stay in an unhealthy marriage just to avoid divorce but maybe try working it out before going to divorce. There is counseling, therapy, trial separation, all sorts of things you can try if both partners are willing to put in the effort.
" First, President Gordon B. Hinckley (2000, p. 134) said: “There is now and again a legitimate cause for divorce. I am not one to say that it is never justified. But I say without hesitation that this plague among us
. . . is not of God.” Referring directly to the doctrine of marriage, Elder Dallin H. Oaks (2007, p. 70) explained:
“Because ‘of the hardness of [our] hearts’ (Matthew 19:8–9), the Lord does not currently enforce the consequences of the celestial standard [of marriage]. He permits divorced persons to marry again.” Like the ancient Israelites whom Moses suffered to divorce (see Deuteronomy 24:1), Latter-day Saints too struggle to live the higher law. Thus, a loving God gives us a law more aligned with mortal capabilities and circumstances. In addition, Elder Oaks (2007, p. 71) taught that “when
a marriage is dead and beyond hope of resuscitation, it is needful to have a means to end it.” For Latter-day Saint couples, it would be wise to make this determination in consultation with a bishop. Elder Oaks also explained that when one spouse abandons the other, the option of divorce allows an innocent spouse to remarry"
The lord knows our needs and situations and would never punish us or make us feel bad for getting a divorce. I personally feel he would rather us get out of unhealthy situation then staying and suffering. The purpose of this life is to grow and progress as individuals and as painful divorce can be it also provides lessons and experiences that help us become better, stronger individuals. Also, the decision to stay or divorce is between the couple, and the lord. So, we should never force our opinions onto them thinking we know what's best for them.
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